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Designed for anyone one bad Zoom call away from a full personality reboot. This bag captures the deep exhaustion of being chronically online, emotionally exhausted, and expected to function like a real human anyway.
The front quietly pleads for a nap (and maybe a soul swap), while the back confirms what you already knew: you’re a sentient eyebag with a decent internet connection and crippling self-doubt.
Perfect for hauling iced coffee, late-stage burnout, and the weight of your unprocessed identity crisis.
Features:
• 100% certified organic cotton
• Fabric weight: 8 oz/yd² (272 g/m²)
• Dimensions: 20″ × 14″ × 5″
• Capacity: 6 gallons
• Weight limit: 30 lbs
• Long dual straps for hands-free spiraling
• Two-sided design: soft cry for help in front, diagnostic stamp in back
• Sad B*tch Survival Squad original for the mentally spicy and mortally tired
Product Description
• 100% certified organic cotton 3/1 twill
• Fabric weight: 8 oz/yd² (272 g/m²)
• Dimensions: 20″ × 14″ × 5″ (50.8 × 35.6 × 12.7 cm)
• Capacity: 6 gallons (23 l)
• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)
• 1″ × 25″ (2.5 × 63.5 cm) long self-fabric dual straps
• Open main compartment, flat bottom
• Blank product sourced from China or India
Disclaimer: The care instructions on the tearaway label may wash off after cleaning.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability and formaldehyde level requirements.
In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Linchpin Industries and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 1420 E Edinger Ave, Suite 219, Santa Ana, CA 92705 or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.
I Need a Nap and a Personality Transplant (Tote Bag)
$29.00
Reliable shipping
Flexible returns
The front quietly pleads for a nap (and maybe a soul swap), while the back confirms what you already knew: you’re a sentient eyebag with a decent internet connection and crippling self-doubt.
Perfect for hauling iced coffee, late-stage burnout, and the weight of your unprocessed identity crisis.
Features:
• 100% certified organic cotton
• Fabric weight: 8 oz/yd² (272 g/m²)
• Dimensions: 20″ × 14″ × 5″
• Capacity: 6 gallons
• Weight limit: 30 lbs
• Long dual straps for hands-free spiraling
• Two-sided design: soft cry for help in front, diagnostic stamp in back
• Sad B*tch Survival Squad original for the mentally spicy and mortally tired
Product Description
• 100% certified organic cotton 3/1 twill
• Fabric weight: 8 oz/yd² (272 g/m²)
• Dimensions: 20″ × 14″ × 5″ (50.8 × 35.6 × 12.7 cm)
• Capacity: 6 gallons (23 l)
• Weight limit: 30 lbs (13.6 kg)
• 1″ × 25″ (2.5 × 63.5 cm) long self-fabric dual straps
• Open main compartment, flat bottom
• Blank product sourced from China or India
Disclaimer: The care instructions on the tearaway label may wash off after cleaning.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability and formaldehyde level requirements.
In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Linchpin Industries and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 1420 E Edinger Ave, Suite 219, Santa Ana, CA 92705 or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.
Size guide
| BAG WIDTH (inches) | BAG HEIGHT (inches) | BAG DEPTH (inches) | STRAP LENGTH (inches) | STRAP WIDTH (inches) | |
| One size | 20 | 14 | 5 | 25 | 1 |